you might think it was only jokes. you just dont know the pressure.

physically drained.

I never say this but

Im so glad you are mine.

You picking me back to Him while im going so far.

You remind me about a lot of good things in my life.

Yes, you even never say a word.

But you just did.

my soul received a new happiness through you.

And your every sincere smile making my self said 

'Thank God for putting him beside me'

- D 

but still im thankful for this happy-with-no-reason feeling =)

making sure you're okay while forgot making myself sure that i'm okay

new week 

after a heavy yet tiring 

yet happy yet broken-hearted weekend.

body aches.

panda eyes appear.

i need sleep.

but.

a lot of things to do.

and rainy outside.

yes.

rainy along the day.

oh earth, you must be kidding me.

And why someone told me not to fall for you too deep

i guess you didnt notice hahahhaa

Well 

I know you have a lot a lot and a lot of things to handle.

Your brain isnt about to break to a two side but even many

But please appreciate my voice 

Im here 

Im screaming for you, near you, right in front of you

And you couldn't hear

Did you say that we're a team?

*sigh*

Im at the point where im wondering what my life would be in future. What kind of job i really want. Who i am.

It sucks to live a life i dont really want. I dont want this job but i wont fight. Im just stuck here no move with no reason. 

I know it must be happy being payed by something you like.

I need to move move move

I wont be here

I know i can

But why im still here

i've found that growing up means being honest. about what really really i want. what i need. what i feel. who i am.

Remind me that every second is a chance. 

Remind me also that there's a hope.

Dear sky.

Its okay to be so dark.

Cry as much as you want. 

But please be calm. 

Hold your anger. 

Im scared.

Seriously scared.

Ketakutan teraneh bagiku adalah

Disaat aku menutup mata untuk tertidur, aku takut aku akan mati.

Pelayanan ngga boleh ngeluh tapi aku lelah badan dan pikiran.

Sampai tidak bisa membedakan sakit dikepala ini benar2 sakit atau hanya sekedar penat saja.

Aku ingin tidur.