Friday 18 sept 2015

22.55pm

"IM ACTUALLY NOT IN A GOOD MOOD"

-

There are a few part of me that i dont want you to know.

Not a bad things or negative side of me.

Its just a personal things and im just too ashamed and dont have enough confidence to show you. 

One thing you need to know, trust me everything you can see of me now are all real, i do everything for you sincerely with all my heart.

Tuhan Yesus yang baik.
begitu banyak versi tentang berita kedatanganMu
aku takut. 
aku senang.
semua bercampur aduk.
aku menyesal karena telat menyadari akan pentingnya mengenalMu lebih dalam.
aku tidak akan bersungut2 lagi. aku mau serius menjalani hidup dengan baik.
baik dengan Engkau maupun sesamaku.
aku ingin mengenalMu lebih laagi. 
aku mau semua perbuatanku membuatMu tersenyum.
aku ingin mencintai semua orang yang mencintaiku dan yang membenciku.
aku akan melakukan yg terbaik yang aku bisa.
sampai entah kapan Engkau datang menjemputku.
Tuhan Yesus, aku sayang Tuhan Yesus.
 

Ya Tuhan Yesus.
Bapak2 itu kasihan sekali.
Air mata ini masih saja menetes diperjalananku menuju rumah.
Bolehkah Kau jagai dia untukku?
Tibakan dia ditujuannya dengan selamat ya Tuhan Yesus :"(

i have my own reason everytime i ignore it.
even when i dont want to tell you the reason, could you please understand?
i just want my self comfort, am i wrong? :(

the last week of the months.
ngga kerasa udah mau sebulan dikantor baru.
terima kasih Tuhan Yesus aku bisa jalanin semuanya.
terima kasih juga atas hari hari yang bahagia.
aku bersyukur atas segala kebaikanMu atas kehidupanku.

Hey blog, long time no see.
i admit it, i only have you to write and tell what i really feel
since i have lost once, and it because my own fault.

I miss rain.
I miss my gloomy day with rain fall, enjoying my me time, spend my precious time for thinking and wondering random things with my own self

What should i do?
My old playlist taking me back to the time when we're not like now.
Even smell of perfume from that foreigner who passed me on the street can easily reminds me of you
Taking a deep breath thousand times and pretends like, yea everything is fine.
Well, i guess. Its only me who thinks too much.

But im pretty sure about the things that comfort me.
I know time will tell.
I will do everything i want, because every second is so precious.
Nothing cant stop me. Nothing.

Mengapa mereka datang disaat aku ingin sendiri?

Mengapa mereka pergi disaat aku ingin bersama mereka?

Tidakkah ada waktu yang tepat bagiku?

Apakah akan selalu seperti ini?

dont come for disturbing.
you never lose your way to confusing me.

 

i have everything if i they're all around me ^^

*Abang and Novi, so sorry :P
cutting you both doesn't mean i didn't love you. peace ^^V

baik dikira suka.
pas nembak, ditolak malah dingin.

baru juga kenal mas, yailah baper sekali ;")

Terima kasih Tuhan Yesus.

Weekdays di minggu ini tidak semenakutkan seperti yang ada didalam imajinasiku sebelumnya.

Karena tuntunanMu semuanya dapat kujalani dengan baik :)

Semoga minggu depan dapat menjadi lebih baik lagi.

Oh ya, dan juga terima kasih atas hujan yang indah sebagai penutup dihari Jumat ini.

Sudah lama sekali aku merindukannya^^

My first day

Today is my first day in a new office 

I won't expect much

I just want my hand clock running faster until 5pm so i can go home and get some sleep 

I should be excited about today but seriously head feels like spinning since I haven't enough sleep few days ago.

Im just too excited and too focus with my last a week holiday 

And thinks like there is no holiday for tomorrow so i spent my time going somewhere far from the place i live.

so now im dizzy and sleepy.

My eyes like really hard to open, watery, and i can see a few red spot in every corner of my eyes.

Now im just sit in a meeting room in first floor for more than hours.

Waiting. Waiting for what i dont know

They haven't prepare my cubicle yet

And everyone is busy with their own business 

I dont know where is the people

Are they late or something 

Because i only see just five or six employee here while they say there is around 20 employees who work here.

Even the only one person i know haven't come yet. My boss, my big boss.

Aaah what to do what to dooo :(

The cold temperature makes me sleepy even more 

I miss my bed. I miss having quality time with my bed.

Huhu and why they just give me a "seadanya" smile when i say good morning to them. Hahaha maybe this is just my baper feeling. Stupid, should they just like said to you "halooooo" with like hebohhh. hahahaha its called pereus :P well, abaikan~

And ah, another thing that stole my mood is

My pimple.

I have one big new pimple near my corner bottom lip

And im not lying, this is so hurt. 

I realize this is because my own fault -_-

Im lazy to wash my face and put the night cream because im just too sleepy after having a long trip for a whole day.

Randomly wondering my old office and the employees 

What are they doing now. How many job they did today. How was the last monthly seminar. Huh suddenly miss them. Since i have nothing to do here.

Well, anyway those "semangat" words from Sammy and Lenty just made my day. Hihi i feel like smiling after reading those words. Yeay, semangattt!!!

Ups wait, somebody call my name. Catch ya soon! Bubbye~

Being nice with everyone is not as easy as you think
Sometimes you need to sacrifice a lot
Your time, your money, even your feeling
But never mind, because a smile from people i love
is my best favorite view.

When everyone seems getting closer to You, idk why i feel like im the only one who is getting so far from You, and i dont know what to do.
feels like empty inside but dont know how to fulfill.
God, dont leave me.
My heart aching
i couldnt do anything.
Strengthen me.
Feed me more.
I feel like, lost.